Last weekend's topic of discussion over coffee at my place was exploitation of women at workplace.And to my utter surprise everyone has experienced it in some form or the other. For some it's just inevitable for others its what women like.
I have my own words to describe it and after pondering over it, want yours.
For all males out there who think everything is a cake walk for gals in office... Just a smile and every thing falls into place.
My Verdict
Being a girl ,at workplace life becomes a bit complicated for at times it becomes difficult to maintain the balance between decency and arrogance. It can be as trivial as someone hitting on you or may be asking you out.. or can be mental harassment if not physical.
If you are too friendly at workplace people take you for granted and step on your self respect without even realising it and women on the other hand just can't say "NO" to anything that is happening to them , even if they realise the consequences of the same. And in the end feeling guilty of what ever happens , blaming on themselves.
If you are too friendly with your colleagues then others around also expect the same behaviour, fail to understand vibes you get from everyone is different. And then ppl who just lean on you and given a chance are ready to come on to you.Well well.... guys if gals avoid you why can't u take it, she is just not interested.
At the same time if you maintain a poise status at work people find you arrogant and not interested types.
Isn't it difficult to maintain a balance between the two. But the question is "How"?????? 9 months in the corporate office but haven't yet figured it out...Can you Help.........
2 comments:
Most challenging thing in life is: Balance
My piece of advice: Don’t feel sad/frustrated. Analyze your experiences and learn from them
Well… to start with, I would appreciate the way you had blogged this and most importantly thank you to bringing in this topic.
We know its very difficult for a gal to strike the balance between the two things you mentioned: decency and arrogance. But it’s just the way life is. It never had been easy for a guy either to strike the right balance maintaining just the colleague relationship with a gal or just crossing the lines to be a friend(taking the least).
The best solution for these kind of a problem is being what you are… say “NO” if you want to. When you visit a doctor, you don’t go circumlocutory, and not explaining your actual problem. Be direct… if you want the problem to be solved.
But what I have seen is quite different. It might be the Mars-and-Venus-difference-of-opinion case. Though the problem you discussed is true, but I still feel there are few things that needed to be highlighted too.
Why doesn’t a gal say “NO” directly? ‘cuz it might hurt the guy? But if that was the case… and the gal would have been so caring, she wouldn’t have mind anyone treated as a friend… as I have seen in several cases, gals have problem with a few guys, going little more than being a colleague at the workplace … but when they don’t have anyone to hang out with, or discuss a trivial/important issues… a gal herself approaches the same person. Now don’t you think it difficult for the guy to locate the place where he needs to draw the line?
Anyways, I know that it’s ultimately the f-part that suffers, but then a 21st century gal can be daring enough to say that small word “NO”. and, if you think doing that might pose you a problem, there are different ways(as different vibes you get) to say “NO”.
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